Is give Oxytocin a chance (a.k.a. Can YOU relate?)
Yes, people are chomping at the bit to get outside.
Yes, people are having cabin fever.
Yes, people are becoming irritable and short-tempered at home.
Perhaps the reason for that is that the world has become addicted to adrenaline and seeks excitement which is synonymous with an adrenaline rush. When you are addicted to adrenaline, over time what becomes more important to you is avoiding the adrenaline crash. That crash can cause you to become irritable, listless, ADHD prone (adrenaline is natural Adderall), anxious, hostile and more. Being house bound can quickly be unexciting and lead to an adrenaline crash.
One of the reasons we became addicted to adrenaline and excitement and so boredom-phobic is technology and the accelerated stimulus-response speed it immerses our minds and lives in. That happened because many of the former and current giants in technology – Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk – and the many wannabe entrepreneurs who have wanted to emulate them, love the excitement of tech and AI, but aren’t very skilled or desirous of intimate emotional connection. Many of them avoid it like the plague because of how unskilled, incapable and even incompetent they are at it. And these people can’t stand feeling incompetent.
To such people and the billions of people that are addicted to adrenaline, emotional closeness, intimacy, compassion, empathy and especially patience take too much effort and are too b-o-r-i-n-g.
All of those closeness generating experiences are mediated by oxytocin. Oxytocin is a hormone associated with bonding and closeness and has been referred to as the “love hormone.” More accurately would be to call it the “loving hormone,” i.e. something you give to others instead of being only focused on receiving it.
I think one of the casualties of the re-opening is that we may miss out on the possibility of flexing back into oxytocin led pleasure (which is mediated by dopamine) and default back to adrenaline being the main source of pleasure and dopamine.
Why would we want to do that?
If we bring oxytocin back into our lives instead of just chasing after the next adrenaline high…
We can recapture joy instead of mere excitement, intimacy instead of intensity, peace instead of exhaustion and perhaps build and a create a life where we have a home instead of just a house.
BTW a good test to see if the above even registers is to watch this rendition of A House is Not a Home from the television show Glee, to see if it hits a nerve with you… any nerve.
A House in Not a Home
A chair is still a chair, even when there’s no one sittin’ there
But a chair is not a house and a house is not a home
When there’s no one there to hold you tight
And no one there you can kiss goodnight
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Girl
A room is a still a room, even when there’s nothin’ there but gloom
But a room is not a house and a house is not a home
When the two of us are far apart
And one of us has a broken heart
Now and then I call your name
And suddenly your face appears
But it’s just a crazy game
When it ends, it ends in tears
Pretty little darling, have a heart, don’t let one mistake keep us apart
I’m not meant to live alone, turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there, sayin’ that you’re still in love with me, yeah
I’m not meant to live alone, turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there, still in love
I said still in love
Still in love with me, yeah
Are you gonna be in love with me
I want you and need to be, yeah
Still in love with me
Say you’re gonna be in love with me
It’s drivin’ me crazy to think that my baby
Couldn’t be still in love with me
Are you gonna be, say you’re gonna be
Are you gonna be, say you’re gonna be
Are you gonna be, say you’re gonna be
Well, well, well, well
Still in love, so in love, still in love with me
Are you gonna be
Say that you’re gonna be
Still in love with me, yeah
With me, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Still in love with me, yeah, yeah
Songwriters: Burt Bacharach / Hal David
Testimonial by Simon Leslie, Joint-CEO, Ink Global
