Wouldn’t You Agree? #42 The high and unseen cost of feeling entitled?

Q: What is the high and unseen cost of feeling entitled?

A: Few entitled people are happy.  Why? Because nearly every day, nearly every person is disappointed or frustrated by something.  That is unavoidable.  However because entitled people feel entitled to not be disappointed or frustrated, they inevitably become angry every day.  Entitled people can occasionally and temporarily be happy with something or when something goes their way.  However being temporarily happy about something does not a happy person or happy life make.

Wouldn’t you agree?

Please share your comments below.

Be Sociable, Share!

Tags: ,

9 Responses to “Wouldn’t You Agree? #42 The high and unseen cost of feeling entitled?”

  1. Cheryl Sharp Says:

    I agree. I also feel they must be the most unhealthy people—with the most heart disease, the most ulcers & digestive problems, the most cancer, the most likely to need Valium, Prozac……. Wouldn’t you agree?

  2. Michael Toebe Says:

    Definitely agree Dr. Mark.

    People with entitlement mentalities can never be happy for long because they desire or expect a fantasy life that doesn’t exist. It’s like consciously they know life doesn’t cater to their whims and demands but sub-consciously they feel shocked, hurt and angry their “very-reasonable needs” are being ignored.

    It must be exhausting and depressing to live a life with constant disappointment-turned-to-anger.

    It’s as if their brains and psychology never fully developed. Their childhood experiences must have been traumatic in reality or interpretation and they have never recovered.

  3. K.C. Victor Says:

    Is the opposite of entitlement understanding that the only person whose behavior you can change is your own? There is not a honed parallel there, but it’s close. I am soliciting others’ thoughts on this.

  4. Debbie Says:

    Dr. Mark, I believe that nowadays entitlement has become a system and people are ‘nudged’ into this (belief) system without even realizing it.

    How can we make a difference (using communication) to move them toward an awareness of self-reliance?

    By now, we all know the symptoms and cause of entitlement behaviors, but that knowledge doesn’t make an impact. When modeling a better behavior just doesn’t cut it anymore…what can we do?

  5. Offie Walvatne Says:

    I would agree completely. My work is in healthcare food service and we recently sent a customer survey to our employees. The majority of feedback was constuctive. However, there are some employees who have that sence of entitlement. The comments and complaints they made were of absolutely no value to our team. Thank you!

  6. Ronda Maaskant Says:

    Interesting question, however I think I see a different approach to this question as an American living abroad, I currently live in Stavanger Norway, where most Norwegians feel very entitled with regards to what their government will do for them and should do for them. They in general are a rather happy bunch. I think you can have entitlement without anger, however, I think that the entitlement felt must be similar to the loving relationship of parent and child, not one of a bitter payback/you owe me for past atrocities you or your ilk have perpetrated against me/my ancestors.

    By the way Dr. Goulston, I just finished Just Listen…it is in my top 3 best reads ever. I loved loved loved it, I am very excited for your next one and will now go back to find your past ones. Your daughters are very lucky, and I am lucky to have read your book before mine are completely grown. THANK YOU!

  7. Mark Johnson Says:

    Another consequence is that the entitled person has missed out on opportunities to learn and grow. One of the costs associated with entitlement is that we’re less able to function or make contributions having not gained experience.

    Many hardworking, responsible parents with the best of intentions did not allow their children to participate in work activities and decision making to protect them from failing. Part of that can be attributed to very tough times where it was believed to be necessary.

    Challenge and difficulty teaches us to focus and overcome. Thinking for ourselves along with some needed guidance affords us the possibility to develop in ways that are conducive to better decision making.

    Once grown up then on their own, having to learn skills that would have been in their interest to have learned by experiences. In many ways these persons are confronted with a situation where they have to learn later in life essentially set back necessitating the need to learn later in life.

    Much of the time this is where entitlement arises. A great deal of misery is associated with receiving absent effort unfamiliar with giving or being responsible for oneself.

  8. Debbie Says:

    Don’t know if anyone’s still listening, but we go back to the original question…what can we do to remedy that?

  9. world wide web Says:

    I have been operating my site for nearly a month now yet have had really
    little bit of passion in my blog posts, as your doing
    fairly well I merely questioned if you had any type of
    simple advice?

    Feel free to surf to my site: world wide web