The Website of Dr. Mark Goulston

Dr. Mark: I didn’t know women thought about their children or how she looks that often.

On the other hand, even non narcissistic men are not immune to discovering that sex is a great way to relieve tension.

Men in fact did not ask that sex for sex sake would be such a great tension reliever. It just is. (And as women are becoming more competitive and aggressive in the world, they are not far behind in discovering it). But if a guy is married to a woman who demands and deserves to be treated with respect who would not take too kindly to serving as a vehicle for purely carnal sexual relief, and is someone he respects, he can sometimes have problems covering up his desire to sometimes just use her (and in his mind not very respectfully) for a release rather than to make love.

So… if a man has a large uncontrollable sex drive, feels it is the only way to relieve tension and he has a wife who either has less of a sex drive, would be turned off to having sex the “imaginative” way he would like to and talking about the problem only makes it worse (as he can come off as whining, complaining or sullen and not much of a turn on), what should that man do?

a) hire a prostitute and be sleazy
b) have an affair and be a cheat
c) service himself by masturbating to pornography downstairs in the den and feel pathetic
d) suggest going to a marital/couples therapist (which is too embarrassing for most couples, especially if the man is going to bring up his “uncontrollable” sex drive)
e) sublimate his drive to buying and washing a sports car
f) put a rubber sheet on his bed and hope it all gets worked out in his dreams
g) other ——-

What’s your opinion?

Read about frustrated wives in “Forget Eliot Spitzer, what what his wife thinking?”