Usable Insight Blog

Posted on July 28th, 2014 by Mark Goulston

This is the first in a series.

According to the Merriam Webster Dictionary:

magic bullet


: a drug or treatment that cures a disease quickly and easily without producing bad effects

: something that solves a difficult problem easily

Is there someone that you want to stop feeling frustrated by, because you are continuing to be in a relationship with that person and it doesn’t serve the situation and it doesn’t serve you?

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Posted on July 27th, 2014 by Mark Goulston

Q: If there was one personality type that you should never marry, what would it be?

A: At all costs try to identify and steer clear of the “embittered personality.” 

Embittered personalities are nearly completely unforgiving and mean spirited towards people who they perceive have done them wrong.  You can initially be lulled into a false sense of security because they often have a habit of initially putting you on a pedestal before they rip you off it and add you to the pile of people they continue to feel scorn and contempt for.  One of the best ways to identify them is to hear what they say about ex-spouses, ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, their parents, ex-bosses, etc. The more the vitriol in their voice and the less they see any and accept any of their contribution to past problems, the more likely you are dealing with such a person.

Wouldn’t you agree?

Please share your comments below.

Posted on July 20th, 2014 by Mark Goulston

Q: What is the least used coping mechanism to deal with something that is intolerable?

A: Tolerate it.  I’m not being glib.  One of the ways to do that is to ask yourself: What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What does it make me want to do? Just doing that and repeating it as needed can often make something intolerable, tolerable.

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Posted on July 16th, 2014 by Mark Goulston

Step 1: Own It — It wasn’t a bad dream… it happened.  Accept that it happened.
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